Dinobots Will Save You

Written by Optimus Prime on February 5, 2024. Posted in Dinobots.

I can’t help thinking of the synergistic opportunities of a Dinobots to the rescue scenario in No One Will Save You Too. Too cynical? Neverrrrrr. 30 second elevator ride? Ok. Dude. Imagine….

I cower behind my overturned couch as the creepy aliens close in with their freaky mind control slugs. Their telekinetic powers pin me against the wall – I’m doomed! Suddenly, a thunderous robotic roar echoes from outside. The aliens pause, puzzled. CRASH! My front wall explodes as a giant mechanical T-Rex bursts in, Grimlock-style! Behind him, his merry band of Dinobots start smashing aliens left and right.

“Me Grimlock say get nasty hands off human girl!” the dino leader bellows. He whips out his flaming energon sword and skewers one of the alien freaks. Nearby, Slag the Brontosaurus happily stomps aliens into green goo. An alien aims its parasite slug right at me – but swooping Pterodactyl Swoop snatches the slug in midair and crushes it in his beak. “Ptooey! Slug taste nasty!”

Soon the room is filled with smashed alien bits and triumphant Dinobot roars. Grimlock looms over me, grinning his steely T-Rex grin.”Many thanks, oh mighty Dinobots!” our damsel sighs gratefully.

“No problem, puny human!” rumbles Grimlock. “Stupid aliens no match for us!” And with a final dino bark, the Dinobots thump away, in search of their next smashing good time!

So, like, waddyathink?